Re: walk in beauty

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i need that and i am endlessly sorry

to begin with. again. i’m sorry

that night on the 14th of june when i was about to turn 24  i had a dream.

i was sleeping alone in some random bed in some random guest house. in v. … not that random i guess.
you were there. the dream i mean. and it was so clear and so dull! because i could not talk when you were sitting opposite to me. we were in an old cab

i was looking at you unable to even open my mouth to make a sound and you were holding my both hands just to let me know it was alright.

you were not talking to me not to force my useless attempts to speak because you knew i couldnt… so we were just two silent handholders looking each other in the eyes.

in an old cab…you know the ones where back seats face one another. i’ve never been in one how figure. but even now i can actually feel the smell of it…

i woke up the next morning loving you with my all heart for your silence which i so desperately wanted to break that night in an old cab… and i couldnt.

you have chosen silence to comfort me
you have chosen silence to stand by me
you have chosen silence to join me in it

my partner in crime, my dark knight

by the power vested in me by ability of speech i now break the silence

it took me almost a year and an imaginary night in an old cab to do that and i swear i do not expect things to be any different from now on

i just hope that next time we will be walking in a field on a cloudy day… i want us to be talking then.

n.

p.s. maybe my sore and spotted brain came up with another paranoia, and all you wanted to say to me that night in a cab was simply ‘happy birthday’..?

06-19, 01:57

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Filed under mails, mails & messages

Tags: hotel, talk