walk in beauty

dear,
more than ten years ago I was living with the navajo tribe in arizona, usa.
I learned from them about life, about nature, about myself.
there is one prayer I like to remember:

I have a cunning plan

This was not supposed to be easy, so I didn’t let it get me down for too long. I had business to do, therefore I pushed the shrubs far back into the attic of my brain and continued.
I came here with a plan, and I was willing to execute it.

coffee with a cow on the wall (11-03, 16:52)

With your mail you touched the fundamental question, Esme: Can someone be happy, if this happiness is founded on the unhappiness of someone else?    

I will see her again

What can I say? After all those days, after the hope and the despair and the loneliness, we will meet. We will bloody meet again. I am so excited I can’t close her text message for minutes, I keep staring at the screen of my phone, reading and reading her words. We will see each [...]

time

esme
it is good to learn that you are happy
I always wanted you to be happy
I always wanted you to be happy because of me. together with me
I always wanted us to be happy together
still want it today
but obviously I failed    

Re: knight

i am alright yes. les is here, he got cold so i am nursing him.
mick, what happen to me made me realize how fragile and vulnerable people are
i have always thought i was a strong person, indifference was my armour… but once you open your heart to one person, anyone can come in.
when he looks [...]

rain, finally

tonight, a bat in my bedroom woke me up, hunted down by the cats. I caught it with a plastic cup and set it free.
later, there was your sms.
what you said did not kill me. I’m dead already, have been since I left you. you gave me the kiss of life. you gave me [...]