it is only one month

Life without Esme is starting to become reality. The throbbing pain, the checking of e-mail and SMS just to find nothing, the memories becoming threadbare – all these signs of a love lost are closing in on me. I try to keep them at bay by re-reading our story, by re-arranging reality, by re-inventing history.
But [...]

tomorror never comes (09-09, 19:49)

I call for both.Love and madness. It feels like ages since your lips touched my skin.We are out for dinner now.In three hours we will go back to the hotel to make love the whole night.  

longing for the healing hand (09-06, 14:03)

My day is constant throbbing pain. No remedy at hand. Acids eating me up from inside. Longing for your healing hand. And missing the touch of your lips.

slow

I woke up this morning with your kiss on my lips. now I’m making love to you. slowly. slowly. deeply. slowly. mmh. slowly. oh yah. slowly. mmh. oh esme. slowly. slow. slow. slow. slo. slo slo o o o o ahm, ohyeah, ohyeah, mmh, mmh, mmh m m m – – MMMHMm, AAAahmmm. Oh esme… [...]

the day after leaving her

“I love you”, I texted her at night. I love you. I love you. I LOVE YOU, that’s what I wanted to shout out loud. I was in despair. I was in disrepair. I was destroyed. I was in love.    

your lips where they belong (09-04, 15:36)

Have just woken up.. Had been puzzling last night away. Again. I miss your touch.. I miss your lips where they belong. I love u

you are my katrina

esme!
your yesterday’s silence killed me
filled my stomach with magma
made me walk the day like a zombie
more dead than living    

keep on projecting a world

what do we see when we see other people? do we see how they are? how we want them to see? do we see an image projected by others? or do we see merely shadows on the wall of a cave?
how I see you: kaleidoscopial. you are so many things, I told you so already. [...]

on lips never touched (08-28, 04:43)

Having returned from the airport, I found your message. No sleep for me as well. Long to cradle you in my arms and rock you to sleep.